Covenant, Not Contract
January 6, 2022 • by Irene Sun
A missionary who was quarantined because of a global pandemic. On the other side of her door is a country full of people who need to hear the Gospel.
A homeschool mother of four who was diagnosed with cancer at 39. Her husband cared for her and her children while her body was injected with poison to kill the cancer cells.
A writer and poet who cannot write because of her chronic pain. She had 3 surgeries in the last 16 months. She is 32.
The persecuted body of Christ in Afghanistan who are fleeing and hiding from a Muslim extremist group who came into power within the span of days.
Trampled salt and hidden light. These are sisters and brothers who rose to their feet at the sound of the Great Commission and flung their lives away for the sake of the Gospel. Yet for reasons to be revealed, the Lord keeps them waiting, seemingly doing “nothing.”
Idolatry of Being Useful
I want to be used by God. But sometimes I make my usefulness into an idol. Tim Keller’s definition of an idol is helpful here: An idol is a good thing becoming an ultimate thing. The desire to be useful unto God is a good thing. But when our usefulness becomes the ultimate thing, our usefulness becomes our identity. We reduce ourselves and others down to a tool for a specific function. Tools expire and become obsolete. If our usefulness is the thing that defines and satisfies us, what will happen when our usefulness is taken away?
Behind the question “What is God's will and purpose for my life?” is sometimes a subtle selfishness. We often ask the question not as a servant waiting to be sent, but as a master demanding to know. Instead of rejoicing, we get impatient and envious when we watch God raising other people up to do his work. Instead of waiting upon the Lord as our hope in life and death, we wait upon the “great work” we will do to bring meaning and importance to our lives. In perpetually crying, “Use me!” we can make our own significance, fulfillment, and legacy the center of our prayers.
To be used by God, however, is not that special. It is a good thing, but it certainly should not be the ultimate thing. The Lord can use anything, anyone. He used the hard heart of the pharaoh and the betrayal of Judas for his purposes. He can speak through anyone. He spoke through a donkey. So, it is not that special to be used by God.
“I want to be used by God. But sometimes I make my usefulness into an idol.”
Covenant, Not (Job) Contracts
“God uses ordinary people” is one cliche in Christianese that needs to go away. It is misleading at best, and deceptive at worst. God does not make us his children to use us.
Jesus did not die on the cross in our place and for our sins—to use us. He died to be in a relationship with us, in communion with us. We commune with the Father, through union with his Son, by the power of his Holy Spirit. He makes with us a covenant, not a contract, and certainly not a job contract.
What would you think of me if I had children only to use them? What if my relationship with my husband revolved around my plans and purposes for his life? You would think I was a horrible person. This language of being useful and purposeful is absurd when it comes to our human relationships, but why do we use this kind of language in our prayers to God?
Many followed Jesus not for Jesus’s sake, but for their own ambitions and desires. They wanted to use Jesus as a means to their own end. Perhaps this is why we think Jesus wants to use us, because we shamelessly want to use him for our own agendas. But Jesus does not call disciples to use us. He does not need us.
Yes, Jesus Loves Me
Jesus called his disciples to follow him, to be with him, and to participate in his work because he loved them. Jesus not only called the rich young man to sell all his possessions, but Mark tells us Jesus loved him (Mark 10:21). Jesus called his disciples to himself because he desired them (Mark 3:13). Being loved and wanted by God far surpasses being used by God.
I had a baby who lived for just seven weeks in my womb. We named the child Immanuel. Among my fiercest hopes in life is to meet and know Immanuel someday. In the scope of eternity, Immanuel’s seven weeks of life in my womb has just as much significance as my life long service (by the mercies of God) unto the Lord. My child matters not because of what he or she has accomplished, but because he or she was created, wanted, and known by the Maker of Stars.
“Being loved and wanted by God far surpasses being used by God.”
Weak with Him
When Elisabeth Elliot turned 65, she said one of the splendors of being old is the heightened perspective on all of life. The higher she went, the more she could see. The things of the earth became strangely small. “There is only one thing in the whole universe that matters,” she asserted, “and that is to know God.”
The Apostle Paul is arguably among one of the most useful, purposeful men in history. He was born with the right lineage and achieved the highest ranking in his field. Yet, he counted “everything as loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus.” He suffered the loss of all things that made him important and counted them as rubbish in order that he might gain Christ, share in his suffering, and become like him in death (Phil. 3:8-9).
Are we willing to be weak with Christ and weak for Christ? Lilias Trotter once wrote, “For the world's salvation was not wrought out by the three years in which he went about doing good, but in the three hours of darkness in which he hung, stripped and nailed, in uttermost exhaustion of spirit, soul, and body—till his heart broke.” In our weakness and waiting, we are following in the footsteps of Christ. We are becoming like him in our little deaths.
Here are three ways we can change immediately to stop perpetuating this lie about our utilitarian purposes:
Stop asking God to use us. In fact, stop asking God what is his (utilitarian) will for our lives. We know his (ultimate) will for our lives: to transform us into the likeness of his Son. Instead, we can ask the Lord to give us joy in our sorrows and patience in our waiting. We can remember his promise to be with us as we recite David’s prayer: “The Lord will fulfill his purpose for me” (Ps. 138:8).
Stop using the word “use” when we encourage others. Don’t say: “I can’t wait to see how God will use you.” Instead, we say, “I can’t wait to see how God will complete the work he began in your life.”
Stop comparing. Love God and love neighbors by resisting all temptations to compare. Stop comparing our lives with other people’s lives. Everyone has a different story of coming to know God.
“What is God’s will for my life?” is not a stupid question. Wanting to be useful is not an evil desire. The desire turns rotten only when the question turns into a demand for significance, fulfillment, and legacy, which is an idolatry of self.
The Lord, in his mercy, has given us his answer. He loves us and he chooses us to be his treasured possession that we may “know that Yahweh is God” (Deut. 4:35). He is a God of covenants, not contracts. His will for our lives is to know him, to be with him forever.
* The ideas of this post flowed from something I heard from Rich Mullins years ago. During a season of postpartum recovery, I listened to Rich Mullins's music and several recordings of his concerts. This quote from him stayed with me through the years:
“We all want to be useful to God. Well, it’s no big deal. God can use anybody. God used Nebuchadnezzar. God used Judas Iscariot. It’s not a big deal to be used by God, and the shocking thing in the book of Mark . . . is that it says, ‘and Jesus called to Him those that He wanted.’ And you realize that out of the twelve people that He wanted, only one was essential to His goal in coming to earth. The other eleven people were useless to Christ but they were wanted by Christ. And I kind of go, I would much rather have God want me than have God use me.” - Rich Mullins
Irene Sun was born in Malaysia and is the author of the picture books Taste and See: All About God's Goodness (May 2022) and God Counts: Numbers in His Word and His World. She studied liturgy and literature at Yale University (MAR) and Old Testament and Semitic Languages at Trinity Evangelical Divinity School (ThM). She now teaches her four boys at home with her preacher husband, Hans. They serve and belong to Pittsburgh Chinese Church.
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